I am yet to understand people's fascination with being normal... why in the world would you want to be normal? Hint: fitting in is not a viable answer. I personally know I am different from other people. Why? Because I am lonely. Always, forever, lonely... even when I'm with people. I cannot relate to other people, and so I am always alone.
Normal people share common interests most of the time. These may include books, shows, films, music, activities and/or sports, political views, etc. When two normal people meet, they usually reach a common point between the two of them, and so, after exploring that point, they become friends. If there are more common interests, then the two normal people become friends. Everything is pretty normal.
My main problem with this friendship algorithm is very simple to pinpoint: I am not normal. You see, I am not interested in politics or sports or most television shows. I spend my time with much more abstract entities... ideas. As a child, I spent a lot of my time reading alone, and so I developed a passion for the sciences. Then, I took an endeavor into the social world during my adolescence and early teens, and it failed miserably because I realized I had absolutely no social skills. Now that I am eighteen years old, I can say I have developed some social skills, but I still lack the context in which I can apply them.
I don't watch sports as a general rule, and so the most basic connection that I can develop with any other male is already off the table. I ignore most mainstream pop music, and even though I listen to lots of music, I can rarely build a connection with anyone regarding that aspect. (So far, I have only met two people who are on par with me music-wise.) I do watch some TV shows that others watch, though. They usually revolve around a character with great intellectual prowess who lacks in social skills. While I may not possess the same intelligence as the aforementioned characters, I can still relate to them. However, in my experience, TV shows don't work as a basis for friendship. Books is actually one of the viable options, because you have worlds to discuss if you meet someone who likes the same books as you. The catch here is the 'if'. Sports and activities? I have sufficient personal skills for team sports, but I can never play with a team. The only sport I really enjoy is squash, mainly because I play against one person only (or sometimes alone), and it is all quiet. Since all of my other favorite activities include me sitting down alone in my room, there's not much for me to connect on. As for films, I haven't seen some of the most famous films that everyone my age has probably seen (e.g. Lion King and Titanic), but I've still seen my share of films. My taste is different from that of others in films too. As for political views, I have none. I do not follow the news or care about what political parties are doing. For all I care, they are not real.
So, given that information, it is not hard to see why I cannot and do not communicate with other people normally. In any normal conversation that other people have, I usually don't have anything to contribute with, and so I remain silent. All of my attempts at talking fail, and thus I become a ghost in real life. My absence is as good as my presence... both go unnoticed, unfelt. I drown in my own loneliness and misery, no matter how many people are around... but I've learned to enjoy them.
You may be thinking that I have no life right now. If by life you mean a normal life, then I agree with you. My life basically revolves around music, books, films and shows, thoughts, ideas, colors, and music. I enjoy all of these things alone, and I really dislike it when I have to abandon them in order to partake in some normal activity. I enjoy being alone as long as I am not forced to remember that other people aren't, by being with lonely with other people.
Ironically enough, I am only capable of connecting with people who cannot connect normally, like me. We all share the same loneliness, and so we connect. Maybe it's all about being different...
Normal people share common interests most of the time. These may include books, shows, films, music, activities and/or sports, political views, etc. When two normal people meet, they usually reach a common point between the two of them, and so, after exploring that point, they become friends. If there are more common interests, then the two normal people become friends. Everything is pretty normal.
My main problem with this friendship algorithm is very simple to pinpoint: I am not normal. You see, I am not interested in politics or sports or most television shows. I spend my time with much more abstract entities... ideas. As a child, I spent a lot of my time reading alone, and so I developed a passion for the sciences. Then, I took an endeavor into the social world during my adolescence and early teens, and it failed miserably because I realized I had absolutely no social skills. Now that I am eighteen years old, I can say I have developed some social skills, but I still lack the context in which I can apply them.
I don't watch sports as a general rule, and so the most basic connection that I can develop with any other male is already off the table. I ignore most mainstream pop music, and even though I listen to lots of music, I can rarely build a connection with anyone regarding that aspect. (So far, I have only met two people who are on par with me music-wise.) I do watch some TV shows that others watch, though. They usually revolve around a character with great intellectual prowess who lacks in social skills. While I may not possess the same intelligence as the aforementioned characters, I can still relate to them. However, in my experience, TV shows don't work as a basis for friendship. Books is actually one of the viable options, because you have worlds to discuss if you meet someone who likes the same books as you. The catch here is the 'if'. Sports and activities? I have sufficient personal skills for team sports, but I can never play with a team. The only sport I really enjoy is squash, mainly because I play against one person only (or sometimes alone), and it is all quiet. Since all of my other favorite activities include me sitting down alone in my room, there's not much for me to connect on. As for films, I haven't seen some of the most famous films that everyone my age has probably seen (e.g. Lion King and Titanic), but I've still seen my share of films. My taste is different from that of others in films too. As for political views, I have none. I do not follow the news or care about what political parties are doing. For all I care, they are not real.
So, given that information, it is not hard to see why I cannot and do not communicate with other people normally. In any normal conversation that other people have, I usually don't have anything to contribute with, and so I remain silent. All of my attempts at talking fail, and thus I become a ghost in real life. My absence is as good as my presence... both go unnoticed, unfelt. I drown in my own loneliness and misery, no matter how many people are around... but I've learned to enjoy them.
You may be thinking that I have no life right now. If by life you mean a normal life, then I agree with you. My life basically revolves around music, books, films and shows, thoughts, ideas, colors, and music. I enjoy all of these things alone, and I really dislike it when I have to abandon them in order to partake in some normal activity. I enjoy being alone as long as I am not forced to remember that other people aren't, by being with lonely with other people.
Ironically enough, I am only capable of connecting with people who cannot connect normally, like me. We all share the same loneliness, and so we connect. Maybe it's all about being different...
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